If you're new here, you may want to subscribe to my RSS feed. Thanks for visiting!

We all know what a honeymoon is.  Extrapolate the concept of celebrating a life-changing event with the foci of a new family and a beloved addition in utero, and you have the “babymoon.”  Coined in 1996 in The Year After Childbirth by Sheila Kitzinger, the concept hadn’t reached mass popularity until the later half of the 2000′s, but now an entire subset of the travel industry is popping up around the babymoon, and new sites are now out there 100% dedicated to the concept.  Primetime news sites are featuring exposes on the new trend such CBS News, ABC News and the NY Times, and even Fodor’s and Frommer’s communities are getting into the action.   Clearly such ubiquitous parent sites as babycenter.com and parenting.com are highlighting the trend.

So, why take a babymoon in the 2nd trimester?

Aside from the obvious celebrating the impending bundle of joy, there are several good reasons to take a babymoon…

• The best time your wife is going to feel is in the 2nd trimester.  The nausea subsides, the heartburn cools, and her tiredness even improves.  (Want to know the cause of those physical afflictions? Check out my post on Pregnancy Hormones…)
• You can still fly.  Doctors typically don’t advise against flying until well into the 3rd trimester.  That means she’s feeling good AND can travel.  There’s only a small window for this during the pregnancy, so take advantage.
• Quiet time for mommy and daddy.  We all know life is going to get picked up by the tail flipped up in the air and do a perfectly executed face-plant.  With all the change and craziness to come over the next 18 years, a babymoon is a perfect time to enjoy your wife before the kids come into the picture.
• 2nd Trimester Sex.  Somewhere between raging hormones and actually feeling good, and right at the intersection of feeling overwhelming love for her husband and sensitivity of certain parts of her anatomy – that’s where libido comes back into the picture.  It’s a mystical, magical and wonderful gift to new dads.   Just when you’ve accepted celibacy for nine months, guess what?  The heavens have smiled upon you because your wife starts to get that itch again in the 2nd trimester.  Take advantage of it, fellas.  Want to make it more special for her while increasing your likelihood for action?  Romance the mommy-to-be in a location away from home where she’s less likely to get distracted by her nesting impulse.

There are even more reasons that I’m sure you can think of, but do be sure to take into account the below considerations if you decide to take your beloved on one of these…

• Some airlines require a doctor’s note to fly if you are at a certain point in pregnancy – usually late 2nd trimester to 3rd trimester.
• Some destinations are not preggers-friendly, and may require vaccinations.
• Long travel times are not only uncomfortable for pregnant mommies but also potentially dangerous - make sure she gets up every hour or so to stretch her legs and walk the aisles.  Embolisms can result from pooling if she sits too long.   This goes for long drives as well.
• Decent medical facilities are a must.  Do not go where quality care is not readily available.
• Consider cancellation insurance on your flight and travel arrangements, but read the fine print.  Many plans don’t include pregnancy as a valid medical reason for cancellation.
• Be sure she can eat a variety of good stuff.  If you go to a tropical location, be sure there’s more than just fish available – she’s constrained to 12oz a week of mercury-prone sea-food (i.e. tuna, grouper, mahi, tilapia, hog fish, snapper, etc.).
• Be sure you take plenty of sun screen, keep her hydrated and cool, and keep your OB’s number on speed dial.  Pregnant mothers are not only prone to burning more easily, but with elevated core temps and increased blood pressure, the risk for dehydration, heat exhaustian and heat stroke increase big time for your honey.  Keep hydrating fluids coming (water, not soda), and force her to cool down as often as possible.  Honey, I know you’ll protest this, but it is written and it so.  You can’t fry yourself in the sun regardless of how much you love to lay out.
• When traveling to crowded places, let your protective and chivalrous side shine.  Walk in front of her and don’t be afraid to be gruff or throw a shoulder if need be to keep unwanted drunkards from bumping into and possibly knocking down your wife.  You can say “excuse me” after the danger is averted.

Overall, with a little foresight, planning, and prepartion, you two can take a trip that is romantic, relaxing, celebratory, and fun – and a great way to create a lovely memory before you bring your little one into the world.

Looking for more information or babymoon planning assistance?  Some sites that have made it their business to provide babymoon bookings, advice and help include:

• babymoonguide.com
• babymoonfinder.com
• baby-moon.eu

Regardless of whether it’s across the world, or a couple nights at a nearby hotel, this new trend is gaining traction as a common part of pregnancy for the expecting parents of the 21st century.

Besides, an excuse to go on vacation and have some romantic time with my wife?  No brainer from where I’m sitting. 

-RookieDad Sean

I think I understand now why my father always wanted so desperately to be with his kids on Father’s Day.  Birthdays are a celebration of you, so naturally I always thought Father’s Day was a celebration of your father, a day to pay homage to the guy who gave you the ever-so-important x or y chromosome that makes you who you are.  I guess that’s part of it, but I’m seeing things a little differently now.  This Father’s Day equated to a massive paradigm shift for me that had the physical effect of walloping me with a happy-sappy stick.

I received my first Father’s Day card, and yes, it was sweet; and yes, it was kudos to me about how good a dad I’d be, etc.  Yes, I also received adorable gifts from my wife – cute baby books about daddies (my favorite below right), and a precious frame that displays an ultrasound picture (my sister got me one as well).

Daddy Kisses

Please understand that I’m in no way saying I’m not thankful and touched by these gifts – I very much am.  But I was entertained by something else this Father’s Day.  I know this is going to sound corny, and I’m doing my best not to be sappy here, but I could have not received a gift or card and would have not felt slighted in the least.  In fact I would have still been tickled pink about my Father’s Day.

You know how you have to allow yourself to relax and enjoy yourself from time to time lest you get so caught up in the frenzy that you forget to do so?  I equated Father’s Day as the world’s nod to me to sit back and relish in the fact that I was a father.  THAT became the point of the day for me.   It’s just so obvious to me now, but I don’t think I’d have ever realized it if I wasn’t a new dad.  It wasn’t “dear husband or brother or son, congrats to you for being a dad and here’s a celebration of you.”  It wasn’t about celebration at all, per se.  Or at least not as we usually do it.  For me it was a shift of consciousness.  It provided me an occasion to wrap my thoughts up in all that my baby is and will be to me in the years to come.

When the day was done and dinner was had, cards were opened and quiet descended upon the house, my wife took a nap and I allowed myself to close my eyes for a few very brief moments and allow my imagination to flash to the future: the first time my baby crawls, the first time I hear its laugh, its first date without me tagging along as a chaperon, and its first heartbreak, moments of pride and ones of disappointment but more than anything flashes – one after another – of sheer love.  I love this kid and I don’t even know it yet.  I know what love is and I feel it for all sorts of people in my life.  Mostly, and more than anyone else, I feel it for my wife….sometimes so much it hurts.  But what I felt as I allowed myself those glimpses into the future – man, that was love like I’d never felt it before.

I decided that after I caught my breath and regained composure I would 1) document this enormous paradigm shift, and 2) wade through the sappiness and get to the point of the thing as best as I could to explain to folks what I think my dad always felt and never told me.  Father’s Day isn’t about the celebration of fathers.  It’s a moment the fathers allow themselves to relish and celebrate their kids.  All the dads I know tell me that there is nothing in this world like being a daddy.  I discovered – really the thought smacked me upside the head like a 10 pound salmon pitched across the room – that it’s more about my baby, about the whole world and the rest of my years wrapped up in this little thing that’s not even born yet.

Maybe it’s different for other fathers.  Hell, maybe its the same and none of us want to share the revelation, but rather keep it to ourselves like a little piece of heaven that’s all our own that we’re entitled to at least this one day a year.  Regardless, this is my new view of Father’s Day.  I’m not sure I can explain it any better, but I just want to say: I understand now, pops.

-RookieDad Sean